Tpyo

Simple typographical errors don't bother me quite as much as blatant errors in typing, such as misuse of your/you're and there/their/they're. I will admit that I enjoy finding them (typos and errors) in documents, but occasionally it wears at my hope for our future. Are we really so lazy that we can't manage to proofread our own writing, that which is a representation of ourselves? What does it say about a person who can't take a minute to overlook and refine something they have written?

In the world of text messaging now, I cringe at the use of abbreviations such as "ur" and "y" among others. I personally do my very best to use proper grammar in such messages in hope that I will inspire others to do the same.

Engineers are the worst when it comes to gramma, spelling or even clear writing.  The irony is that people who take great pains with trivial details can't be bothered to learn how to use their mother language. 

 I had the misfortune to spend a year or so as the "Quality Assurance Director" for a large-ish, now defunct company.  In order to maintain our ISO rating, everything and I mean EVERYTHING had to be documented.  I took it upon myself to read all the documents and send paperwork back if it didn't meet basic standards for grammar, clarity and completeness.  

Mistakes such as "taunt" for "taut" and all the "your/you're"-type goofups would drive me into paroxysms of outrage.  I was roundly hated by everyone on the Engineering side. 

Pity my poor mother, the classic first grade teacher with perfect handwriting, perfect spelling, etc. etc. who sent her only son to Engineering School at our state college only to have him read a story in the college newspaper that changed his entire writing style. This story was written phonetically and probably includes most of the 'misteaks' a writer could make and still have the product understood.  The outcome could not have been worse; he became addicted to this form of spelling and all of his letters and emails to me since 1956 have included that spelling style.  One of his kids even developed a dictionary of "Dad's Words".  I believe he can produce written documents that are correctly spelled, but the reality is that after all of these years, these words remain a kind of code language between the two of us.  We exchange emails about the whether daily; my mother used to try to read what he had written and invariably she would shake her head, look at me and ask "where did we get him?"  Well, we did live honor itch offer lodge dock florist...

The original story was "Ladle Rat Rotten Hut" and began thus: "Hairs annulled furry starry toiling udder warts - warts welch or alter girdle defer ant firmer wans inner regional virgin. Wants pond term worsted ladle gull hoe left inner cordage wither groin murder honor itch offer lodge dock florist.  Disc ladle gull orphan worry putty ladle rat cluck, in furry disc raisin, pimple caulder ladle rat rotten hut."  And so on until the end of the starry/story.

On the real typo topic, one of my favorite local signs is still at the roadside vegetable stand west of here after five years: Glaric  all handwritten - no price - we all just know what they sell.

I think every decent sized community has a sign like your Glaric, Belleball. It might be a typo, or it might be a thinko, but(t) it has been there forever and people welcome it as an old friend when they see it.

I guess the difference is that we indulge someone's "private" ( in the sense of "not publicly funded") errors, but we might not be so tolerant of the public employee's mistake. When the mistake is accompanied by behavior that indicates the person should have known better, we tend to get, um... snarky. 

Like reaction to the Gauguin listing in a certain highly esteemed catalogue that featured a red bearded gent with just one ear... 

And, because we are all fiends here, I can't help wondering: after elixer, does she return the favor? 

And now, because I don't know when I will get to introduce the following piece of erudtion otherwise:

Lift your right foot off the floor. Wiggle your leg so that your foot is moving in clockwise circles. Now, with your right hand, draw the numeral 6 in the air.  Did your foot reverse direction? spooky, eh? 

LIFEOFRILEY : Seems to me you overlooked something. Look over your submission.

Ignatian: I reread it as many times as I could before posting (as I felt I was bound to make an error in a post about making errors), and as many more just now. If you're talking about this sentence, "Are we really so lazy that we can't manage to proofread our own writing, that which is a representation of ourselves?", it sounds better in my voice... If not... Well, I'm not sure

Ar muther toungue iz en desprit kneed uv defents!

I come from a family of teachers and medical professionals, and our dinner table diversions included sparring over puns, etymology, spelling, and definitions, as well as best usage of words. A particular pleasure of mine was the use of words in their secondary pronunciation or meaning, which always generated challenges, reference to the dictionary (always kept close at hand), and my smug victory. No one in my family will play Trivial Pursuit with me now, and I mentioned before that I annoy one and all by doing the crossword with a pen.

I loathe the overuse of the apostrophe, ending sentences with prepositions (Where's it at?), ad spelling (NU KLEEN!), and the use of unexplained acronyms. Few now apparently understand the difference between 'lay' and 'lie' (I lie down, lay the book down), 'less' and 'fewer' (if you can count it, it's fewer, as in less money, fewer dollars), and any number of other usage distinctions. She and her and I! If there should be a tax levied upon the use of the apostrophe and the comma, governments would grow rich indeed. The rule seems to be 'when in doubt, USE IT!'

I was amused to hear on NPR, a year or so ago, the story of the Norfolk courthouse's (if memory serves) new engraved stone plinth. The masons spelled the last syllable in the vernacular, and the entire block had to be done over. Such is life in our brave new world of 'educationalness', where test results are all that matters. It's no wonder that so many other countries surpass the USA in education statistics, when we're mainly concerned about busing kids, test scores, and sports. Typos can be seen as a symptom, I think, of poor education and general laziness, especially if they're not CORRECTED. I make them all the time, typing quickly, but I try to proofread and remove them for clarity.

And then there's Spoonerisms and malapropisms!

Riley:

What does it say about a person who can't take a minute to overlook and refine something they have written?

The use of 'overlook' might be seen as a malapropism of 'look over'. However, it probably qualifies as a secondary usage.

Sorry, no time to research-must dash!

Communications relies on protocols and any programmer would have to admit that 10010110 is not the same as 10011001.  Details matter, and education relies on fine distinctions (the Ides of March are not the same as the ids of March).  Folks who say, 'It doesn't matter; you are splitting hares' don't realize they've just lost their audience (now thinking of rabbits reproducing by forced mitosis).

Communication consists in making a point WITHOUT confusing your audience, and typos inhibit communication.  Folks who claim details don't matter are NOT going to operate on me, try to fix my computer, prepare my taxes, or give me investment advice.  And I'll let someone else comment on unintelligible manuals, webpages that don't 'get to the point', etc.  Anything that wastes folks' time or irritates them is not a productive enterprise!

Doc-Or cunicular parthenogenesis-even more distracting!

I am reminded of the Samuel Johnson quote: But if he really does think there is no distinction between virtue and vice, why Sir, when he leaves our house let us count our spoons."

*skips off, trailing clouds of glory and fits of giggles*

Ah, thank you Olivia... I'm not sure myself, I've always used "Overlook" in that way...

By the way, I agree with you on the liberal use of apostrophes, commas, and dangling prepositions... and I annoy my friends by using a pen on crosswords as well, but I grew up "helping" my grandmother do them, and she used, you guessed it, a pen.

As an editor (at least in my own mind) I have to deal with this at work! All the abuse. The carelessness. The...the...Oh the humanity.

Not here. Not today. I can't deal. I...I....

(runs away sobbing)

I still think that reading Eats, Shoots & Leaves by Lynne Truss has all the answers to the strange rules that we as Americans have put into our language. If you hav enot read it please do so it's quite interesting.

I for one tend to miss most typos, but there is one that REALLY DRIVES ME CRAZY... It's when the words a lot is published as "alot"  I can no longer read anything by the author Kaye Gibbons  because of it.  

I had a 5th grade teacher that pounded into our heads that a lot was 2 words not one.  He would get upset when he saw it printed that way, plus as he was working on his masters degree in teaching language & spelling I was his "sample" subject. 

Why me? #1 he was my neighbor & I was failing every subject except history & lit, the school said I had LD he & my parents maintained that I was bored.  So here I was the 5th grade test subject & I was made to learn the American Speech & spelling rules unlike any other 10 year old has since.  The funny part is that when I read Eats, Shoots & Leaves I already knew & understood the principals she was talking about.  Amazing how that year of extra learning has stayed with me years later.  

I'm not perfect I make typos with the best of them most of the time when my thoughts are moving faster than my fingers are.  I also am the ONLY one in my office area who has a dictionary on my desk that is used many times each day, to help the others spell correctly. 

I commend those guys who changed the sign, I feel sorry for the Judge who couldn't  invite the English teachers in to applaud them for actually being able to teach proper grammer to their students.  I'm sure becuase it was a national Park his hands were tied, by the a bunch of over the edge goverment rules. Wonder if it was considered a hate crime against the sign or against English?    Sorry I'm not really sure I feel what they did was bad I feel the fine was too much & am still wondering if they had to pay to fix the sign was it actually correct this time?          

Anyone care to debate whether "mind your ps and qs" is a reference to type or  ( as is sometimes suggested in internet "lore" ) a reference to keeping track of pints and quarts?

As to overlook and its apparent cousin, oversee, I am reminded of the old fellow who wore glasses because " I don't look so good." 

I think, Riley, that many people use "overlook" to mean "look past" as in "to miss" while "look over" means to examine.  Maybe that was why Cy Coleman and  Carolyn Lee chose "Hey look me over" instead of "Hey Overlook me."  Well, that and the part about rhyming with clover in the next line. They'd have had to go with "overbook" and where would we have been, then?

There is a funny ( well, sort of ) story about the expression more familiar to English people  that starts with the f word and ends with all: "f___ all". It means, well, it means nothing, as in "what do I have to show for all of this grammatical nitpicking? f___ all!"

But the story ( still a LITTLE bit funny, I hope) has it that some non -native speaking film director was very angry and exclaimed "YOU think I know F-ing nothing, but I know F___all"

Sad to say, Google is useless without being able to search for the F word and some protective filter prohibits that...Let's just say it was Otto Preminger. 

OLIVIA is correct .

Lie and Lay? I once tried to explain that it had to do with transitive and intransitive, but that was met with "whatever". Put more simply, somone suggests

Recline = Lie

Place =Lay

That only gets you so far (" Now I lay me down" is confusing, as is "the treasure lay in the doorway")  but  as we used to say on the Spo'ting clays course, If you don't miss the easy ones, you can afford to miss a few hard ones...

 I notice many people have difficulty with Principle and Principal, but you can't tell when they are speaking, which helps.  The one that makes me crezzy is "done" as in "We are done here" , "When you are done with that..." or similar things. Dirty deeds are done dirt cheap, but people prefer to be finished or to have finished, lest someone stick a fork in them... 

Mr. Peterman,

I am an editor by trade. I've said that. I read "The Elixer of Life" four times trying to find the error! Am a horrible speller. Horrible. So was Herman Melville, for the record. And, anyone who can write copy like this should be allowed to miss a few, too:

http://jpeterman.com/product~cat~110211~sku~WDR%204022.asp

I have two inkwells in my brain. One is black. One is red. I find that mixing them makes a mucky mess. So I use one or the other, then switch. I use black here. I use black on my blog. I use black on my first drafts on my creative writing. Then I go over it with red. I use red at work.

I used to think red was the antithesis of creativity. Now I find it to be a very important second layer. I enjoy it—like a crossword puzzle. Plus, I like knowing the rules before breaking them. It feels more revolutionary now that I know I’m breaking them.

The only thing I hate about my professional title is how it makes people behave around me—in their words. I am free with words. I write the way I think, when I'm using black ink. Lots of fragments. Seven em dashes in one sentence. Whatever I want. A regular Henry Miller. An editor's worst nightmare. I want people to feel that free when they write/speak to me.

I recently received (or is it 'recieved?' Kidding) a card for my birthday that read:

Girl one: Where's your birthday party at?

Girl two: Never end a sentence with a preposition. (This was obviously supposed to be me)

Girl one: Okay. Where's your birthday party at, bitch?

I have NEVER corrected anyone for that mistake, unless I have been hired to do so. NEVER. And, for the record, the Chicago guide, my bible, says it is sometimes necessary to end a sentence with a preposition. Love the Chicago. It's the peoples' guide!!!

All that said, when a person gets bold and says that they find errors ANNOYING, always, I'm tempted to pick over their copy.  Even though mine is riddled with errors.

Mr. Peterman,

I would never dream of pulling out my red inkwell on your posts. That said, I would send the proofreader on this particular post to Kuala Lumpur. Actually, I would love to go, too. So if pointing out your two errors today will get me there—I'll post them. Gladly. I just enjoy your words and feel that correcting another's errors only invites that person to return the 'favor.' I like that we write freely here.

LifeofRiley,

Since you asked, I will bring out the red ink. Humbly, of course. And, in full acknowledgement (is that spelled correctly?) that mine is admittedly not edited. Know that I do this to playfully point out that your post still made a point, errors and all. I understood you. And I don't think you're lazy.

That said:

Let’s pretend your first post is sitting in front of me and about to go to press. I would add the word 'the' before 'misuse' in the first sentence. It's not a blatant error; but it reads better with it.

Moving on:

"In the world of text messaging now, I cringe at the use of abbreviations such as "ur" and "y" among others. I personally do my very best to use proper grammar in such messages in hope that I will inspire others to do the same."

I would edit it like this:

"In the world of text messaging now, I cringe at the use of abbreviations such as "ur" and "y," among others. I personally do my very best to use proper grammar in such messages, in hope that I will inspire others to do the same."

I added two commas. Granted, commas are bitches. Also, current editing trends, outside of academic publications, lean toward losing as many commas as possible. Still, as liberally-comma-minded as I am, I would add those. The very old and grumpy editor with whom I work would have added one more. I find that one annoying, though. We usually wind up taking it outside. Red ink everywhere!

I love that language is living and changing. I like having to keep up.

Good morning, all!



Oh. One thing. All the editors I know disagree on this one:

“Moment’s notice”

or

“Moments notice”

Which one?????????????????????????

P.S.

What Olivia said, too.

Bless me Father, for I have sinned. My last confession was shortly before onset of puberty. Since then I have repeatedly and recklessly endangered the English language through speech, writing instrument, and key board.

"My penance is to remain silent until the next Peterman's Eye topic is introduced at 11:00 p.m., CST", he said while crossing his fingers behind his back.

PeterLake!

I love your words. DO NOT leave us until tomorrow.

Wil thiiiiisssss make it betttter? Seeeee? it's eaaaas-ie.  

A very funny 'egg corn.'

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ifdqEmlx-I

Love it. Bringing some serious culture to Peterman's site today.

Back to the red pens. . . 

I'm a wee bit lysdexic at times, especially when my brain is running faster than my fingers...or mouth for that matter.  I frequently speak "typos" or leave important words out of sentences.  My friends and family are used to me speaking like that and usually let it slide, they only bring it up if they can't understand what the missing word or mispronounced word is.  I'm a relatively fast typist, but I'm slowed down by my typing errors which I can't just leave despite what I was taught in typing class.  I am the queen of the backspace-delete-correct, and even then I still leave errors that come up in the proofing process.

The title today?  I read it as TYPO but since I knew the subject was typos, I automatically knew the word in the photo would be spelled wrong and knew SOTP should be STOP.  I don't know if I'm really lazy or if I am just unperturbed by most mistakes, unless they cause major confusion.

As for this...

"Our massage treatments help relive your pain. "

I am a massage therapist and when I joined the staff at a local spa they submitted a write up about me for the local paper's professional section.  The spa manager had written the copy correctly, it was the newspaper staff that made that typo.  We shouldn't have been suprised because this is the same paper that ran a huge christmas add stating "Parent bring your kids down to the Cache Vally Mall to see SATAN!!!".  Being a massage therapist I get emails from friends and family saying "I really need a message, if you can fit me in" or "Can I get a maggase".

The only time typos or poor grammar really bother me (I know I'm terrible with grammar and punctuation, but I can read other work and know when its bad) is when we received job applications or resumes where the candidate states that they have excellent communication skills and/or good grammar and proofreading skills...and then the rest of their resume is covered in mistakes.  There was one girl who had her name spelled differently on the cover sheet, heading and signature line...Jenifer, Jennifer, Jennefir.

Of course there was my great embarassing mistake reading signs.  My sister and I were travelling around Londo and we kept passing buildings with signs that read "To Let".  For some reason when I looked at the signs I read "Toilet".  Finally I stopped in front of one and said "Why do all these buildings have signs advertising toilets?", when my sister regained the power of speech she walked over to the sign and very slowly said (as she underlined each word with her hand) "TO...LET".  Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, yeah.

Don't even get me started on how badly I mix up and confuse numbers.

Ahhh .... Absolution and clemency have never been so sweet!

I'll do my best to not sin against the language no more ;)

LifeOfriley,
In our part of the country, it is not unusual to find a little roadside parking spot called:
"Scenic Overlook," the purpose of which is to lure you from your vehicle to take in a panoramic, geographically or historically significant view.
When it isn't obvious and often when it is, a plaque will expalin why someone has concluded that you might enjoy or learn from the experience.
"Site of the Palmer Schenkel farm, taken, Holstein herd and all, by the killer tornado of April 25, 1951. Good people."

Olivia and Willie,

For the difference between "lie" and "lay", it is really quite simple.  If you LIE on the beach, you get a suntan.  If you LAY on the beach, you get arrested.

Miss1ve,
I'll just be going with- momence notice- and at least everyone will come down on the same (other) side.

DPR, I am shocked!  Well I'm trying to be but I can't stop laughing.

"I can't get no, . . . . . satifaction"   Was Mick Jagger incorrectly using a double negative, or was he just bragging?

This made me feel better.  Since the USMC Birthday Ball is coming up in November, my husband and I decided to check out what the Commandant's Ball was serving for dinner.  As always it was a refined and tempting menu, until we got to the side dishes...

Haricot Verts, Baby Carrot, Roasted Tri-color Mini Fingering Potatoes.

Leave it to a Marine to not know the difference between Fingering and Fingerling.  We did send an email, since we figured that it might cause some embarassment if left unchanged.  It has since been corrected.

Peter,
How about Paul McCartney's "Live and Let Die:"
"But in this ever changing world in which we live in"

To which I am listening to now.
S

Heiress ~ I was wondering were you have been ~ Along with La Donna last nite.  realized I've been missing your insights & what's on the breakfast menu....  Please stick around & help us find La Donna also....

I'm with you about the run on sentences, used to drive my H.S Englsih teacher CRAZY in writing them.  But like many others on this board I tend towrite the way I talk a gret big gush of words fallingout of my mouth in really no particular order.

I tend to that at wotk also Drives the Engineers CRAZY ~ Especially because most of the time I'm talking at 50WPH (word per Hour) and they can only understand 5 of them...  

Oops should be WPS = Words Per Second... MissIve the other night when we were on the phone my DH came in at the end of conversation & when we hung up he said WOW I think you've found someone that can possibly top you in talking speed & topics. Now coming from my DH that's a compliment..... 

Being sent to a remote outpost like Kuala Lumpur for a typo sounds intriguing.

One can only hope (hop) to make (mak) typos (tiepoes) for such a great (grate) posting.

To: DreadPirateRoberts and nachista:  When I get my ashes "layed to rest" is it the same as getting my "ashes laid to rest" ?   One sounds more desirable then the other, at least with the former there's the possibility of future moments of rest; with the latter, the rest is permanent.

Heiress, I'm a big fan of runon sentences, and I'm also a big fan of run on paragraphs as long as the subject is interesting I will overlook many flaws.

HA! Take that grammar, punctuation police.

~Suz

PS - My husband gave me "Eats, Shoots and Leaves" for Christmas...do you think he's trying to tell me something?

I live for run on sentences!  I can't communicate my thoughts without run on sentences (and a heavy dose of parenthesis).

in the words of e.e.cummings:

"life's not a paragraph

And death i think is no parenthesis"

rings90!

When I got off the phone with you, I thought, Did I ever let her speak?! Very excited and wine-filled that night. We will chat again—soon. Any luck with my jean leads?

M.I.

DPR,

If I used examples like that around all these old men to prove my point, my pockets would be full of sand. Grinning.

Now giggling.  

Stoney,

I'm always leaning toward "moments notice," without the possesive apostrophe. After all, the notice doesn't own the moment, does it? Now I'm confused again—and tired—and hungry—and winey. Oh, wine! Yes, please. 

Dude,

How do you spell 'possessssive?' 

Missive I spell 'possessssive' as MINE!

I admit it, I am an online gamer in my spare (laughs out loud very loudly) time. In game chat is some of the most appalling for grammar and typos. Then you run into the L33T speak people who have decided that not talking so good makes you better than the general population. Teh run on sentances misspellings abbriviations are enough to make a educated person break down in tears.....these errors are committed more due to speed and a lack of even a quick glance over what was written prior to hitting the return key but ignorance plays a major role as well.

oh and a middle school teacher of mine used to read to us from East, Shoots & leaves as well as Non campus mentos for effect before reading aloud some of our best mistakes we measured up pretty well I am ashamed to say :-P  

In the Thinko department: "He opened the door with a scowl." Perhaps the author meant he opened the door with his hand, while scowling.

Another favorite, "A hot cup of coffee."  What the many many many authors want to say is, "a cup of hot coffee." But I love this. What fun.

I love me a good typo.  Especially when I get to correct it.

I've been my company's (unofficial) proofreader for years, and I gotta admit - I'm good.  We've hired proofreading services in the past, but I've found typos they missed.  I always find something.  And the satisfaction I get out of circling all those little errors and making my corrections in bright red ink is nothing short of profound.

It's like the satisfaction of sinking a put.

Or balancing an equation.

Or putting the triangle-shaped block in the triangle-shaped hole.

You know when you get it right.  And it feels good.

After I proof a document, and I know the content couldn't possibly be clearer or more correct, I'm filled with utter contentment.  All seems right with the world. 

That's probably what makes me such an avid, and good, proofreader - my inane, enduring quest for the illusion of control in a world, most likely, full of chaos. 

From Herrings Go About the Sea in Shawls:

"When Queen Elizabeth exposed herself to her troops, they shouted "hurrah!""

Gia: I scowl when I hear the ubiquitous "hot water heater."

In the redundancy department I hate "pin number"

An empty bottle of beer

Ashes laid to rest? There is a story about a woman who blew her late husband's ashes... 

 But what about the man who turned into a doorway? 

Anybody else been invited to "touch bases"?

your welcome and,

your turn, too... 

Writing a very dry business proposal for Pitt. Anyone wanna proof my blank page? Will only take you a second, even though I've spent three days working on it. . .GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

First sentence. Somebody give me one. Anything. 

"Maurice was conflicted and didn't know where to turn for the help he so desperately needed."

How's that for a sentence?

The Bull that is a white paper. Are you ready to face it?

How about...

"6 pounds of potatoes please."

or...

"According to this pie chart I need a raise"

or...

"I do not deserve free coffee, but people keep giving it to me."

"Please wake up and take your feet off the table, you inconsiderate louse."

I could do this all day.

Nachista,
You missed a chance at a Monty Python moment:
"The department of redundancy department."

This is like that Monty Python sketch about Thomas Hardy writing a new novel.

"When in doubt remember what the Monty Python boys always say...Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition".

No really, I'm done now.

Nachista and Trask,

Have cut and pasted all your sentences onto my blank page. It looks perfect! I'll just pop it over to Pitt's desk for approval. Have added a pie chart to illustrate your 'raise' suggestion, Nachista.

Now, what type of bourbon should I take him to drink while he reads? An I.V., perhaps? 

The first sentence:

"The long steel-lined corridor echoed to the feeble struggles of the two humanoids clamped firmly under rubbery Vogon armpits."

or, a good opening sentence for a business proposal might be "So there you have it."

Or you could just go with the classic ~

It was a dark & stormy night....

Continue on...

Miss Ive? Why don't you borrow from Peterman? Begin In Medeas Res.

This would have been much easier if not for the pregnant yak.

We regret to inform you, your product has been stolen by a thieving magpie.

Please ignore the bloodstains on this page. The blood is lepine, not human.

Once the flying monkeys were back in their barracks, things began to settle down.

 As usual, it was the third drink that got things off track.

 You'd be surprised at the fluid capacity of a sick kitten.

Don't worry, we aren't charging the hospital bill to you, but...

 I should have heeded my husband's advice to leave the Glock at home today 

 I have no idea if this is related to your recent events, but a very odd parcel was delivered just before we went home yesterday.

I expect our contacts in the Senator's office will help us keep this out of the press, unless you think the sympathy factor will work in our favor.

Please understand, the nympho secretary was actually very good at clerical work, too, when she had the energy.

 I kept looking around, expecting to find a camera crew behind the potted plants. 

 I believe you  should file this under "some day we will look back and laugh".

 I am confident that you would have done the same thing I did, had you been here when this all began.

 I didn't believe in omens before, either. 

Who would have thought our messenger had 50,000 shares of Merrill?

Before we start, do you know a really good drycleaner? 

or, if it is a long document, "If you need to go to the bathroom, you really should do so now".

however Miss Ive, My personal all-time favorite sentence for a business proposal, "This page left intententionally blank".

OMG!

PeterLake. Fantastic.

Guys (and gals):

Have been mulling this for sometime. I posted about my writing renaissance and the room I'm building to get it all cracking. And, of course, about Mr. Peterman.

http://sandinmyswimsuit.blogspot.com/2008/09/room-of-ones-own.html 

How fun would it be to collaborate on some new genre-bending, online cyber-novel. Right? Like I write a chapter and pass it to PeterLake, and he picks the next person, etc. How fun, right?

We could have a deadline, too. Like—whatever you can pull out of your arse in 48 hours, and. . . okay. . .you must also consume seven and a half bottles of wine whilst typing. Red or white, you pick. And no proofreading—ever. Not until the end. Then we have to proof somebody else's.

DPR can drink blush. I'll be lax.

Wanna? Wanna?

See how easy it is to write a proposal for this sort of stunt? WHY CAN'T I DO THAT FOR SOMETHING AS RIVETING AS AUTOMOTIVE MAGAZINES???????????? Why?

I'll restart my penance now.

My reading table at Starbucks is calling to me.

Heiress,

Welcome back, my dear!  Delighted to see you again.  I hope your absence has been fruitful and joyous.

Missive,

Your pockets would be full of sand.  Like your swimsuit?

ExPat,

You remind me of my favorite musing over ham and eggs.  The commitment of the chicken is temporary but the commitment of the pig is permanent.

nachista,

I think Miss Ive may have given up on us.. . . . .

Oh MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOO,

Just sent that last post. Phone rang. At desk. Remember the horrible wrestling with the perfect cover letter for the perfect job (for which more than 300 people have applied)? Just got call for interview. 

Ironically, it's a head editing position. They want me to bring three additional writing samples. I assume they should be error-free. Anyone want to forward me some?

Need air. . .and very short skirt. Kidding. Sort of. This Friday.

Miss Ive,

Terrific.  We can all serve as references!  You'll knock their socks off!

whose head will you be editing?

Your pass along book is a variation on THE EQUISITE CORPSE, a game in which you see only the last word and you add one more, then fold the paper so that only your word is visible... And the name of everybody's favorite New Orleanian's publication ( m. Codriescu)  

AUTOMOTIVE? WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY SO?

If the next word you think of after "backseat" is driver, this may be a little racy for your tastes, but if you have skinned enough knuckles to fill that gallon jar on the counter at your favorite store, then go ahead and buckle up, cause we have a deal for you...

 Remember when chrome was plated on something that might rust, but would never melt? When customizing involved more than a bolt on spoiler and some decals? Check this out: 

OK, granted, in the long run, reliability may be slightly more important than speed, but as John Maynard Keynes famously said, In the Long Run, we're all dead. 

For most of us, our first car was probably not the car of our dreams... 

Vroom, vroom, vroom.

 In the immortal words of Bruce Springsteen... 

Trask,

Whose head (nice, btw)? Yours. That's what the ad said. See why I'm so nervous? Scary job. . .

Love your automotive copy. If I get this job, you can come work for Pitt. Will be very hard to break the news (pun intended) to him. He is very needy and just put me in his will. Poor Pitt.

I really want to play the writing game. Will post more later once I've solved the 'paint color' dilemma.

Maybe an adventure/travel story in which every chapter introduces a new character in a new place, but must include one character from the previous chapter, and so on. Oh, and of course, each character must be wearing a Peterman piece. Yes? Too fun. I get the Portrait dress.

PeterLake,

Thank you, thank you, thank you. Actually very nervous. It's a news editing postion, so more  contriving and driving content than proofing and writing. Will be a nice change. As you can see from my recent trip planning and now collaborative book writing, I'm an idea girl! Cross fingers. 

Oh, and it has a corner office with door, window and blinds. Have looked into it. Priorities. Tons more time for PE!

Am thinking that when they get to the part of the interview where they ask me, "Do you have any questions?," I'll say, "Um, would the door on my office have a lock?" 

That will dazzle them. 

Typos be damned.  I live with a walking "Red Pen"... I stopped instant messaging her when she was correcting my text messages. :) It's an instant message for christ's sake... you're supposed to speil bad and punctuate the way you want... It's POETIC LICENSE damn it!!!

I like my typos.  Gives character. (or stupidity)

You people who have to cross every "t" and dot that "i" should be locked up in a room with all kinds of grammatically challenged sentences on the walls... in permanant ink.

Let the healing begun. ;)

One last thing before I bolt. The position is in still in marketing. And, the best part, paid to bring them into the world of blogging and Twittering. I might be jumping the gun, but should my business cards read:

Miss Ive, princess of Twitterville

of

Miss Ive, woman of cyber-leisure

Cannot decide.

Also, the interview is @3 on Friday, so if you all see me Twittering between 3 and 4ish, please @message me to STOP the noise and pay attention to the nice man in the suit. Okay?

And, finally,

WHO edits Texts? Who? Sometimes I get all the way through punching out the word 'for' and then I'm like, dude, there's a number 4. Use it. You're driving 90mph, for God's sake.

Sorry Riley, the vote is against you today. 

Oh, hey, is there a style guide for texting? They DID have to publish Kwame's. Maybe we could write and market the first ever dirty texting style guide.

See what I mean? Ideas all over the place. 

Nothing will ever match a classmate of mine from grad school who submitted her resume for a job. She listed her MPA proudly at the top as a Master of Pubic Administration.

And she didn't get called for an interview. Go figure.

Eeels, you are bating us again.

I'm looking over a four leaf clover ,that I overlooked before .

All my Xs live in Texas, including the one in EXquisite...

Going to the below-mentioned website will change any block of text or entire website into a crudely-written counterpart. Try it here on this website - it's fun.

http://www.slangaholic.com/

I try to type somewhat coherently on the internet [although I do find myself proof-reading more than the average amount with you guys]
Frequently when speaking in "real life" I have two sentences in my mind when trying to convey a point, and usually end up mashing them together into some senseless jumble of words and this is a run on sentence.
Anywho, here is a collection of some of my favorite mixups uttered by my friends and myself;

"You nailed that head on the face!"
"There's just so much things here."
"Pony pants!" [don't ask what was going through his head]
"So yes for things tomorrow okay?"
"These things are selling like free hot sex."

The example sentence that my friend gives to demonstrate everything he hates about the english language is "And it's like all of the sudden we have a whole nother bag of issues, and it's like irrigardless of how many effort I put into it, it's just ridiculous."
He lives to catch gramatical errors.

[On an unrelated note, I'm thinking of purchasing a bright red waterproof trench coat in honor of hurricane season. Any suggestions? Nothing made from animals and nothing too long, as I'm a short veggo.]

What about Engrish?

http://www.engrish.com/

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b299/nachista/Engarish/engrish2.jpg

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b299/nachista/Engarish/engrish1.jpg

nachista,

great t-shirts!

Willy,

I once existed for a year at OU in good 'ol Norman, OK and had a t-shirt that read "Tuck Fexas"

A typo is an accidental error made by someone who knows better. When one repeatedly makes the same or similar errors, it's a combination of ignorance and failure to learn or look things up. Either inhibits clear commonication, but ignorance is more persistent.

The irony here is that this very piece is riddled with errors. There should be a hyphen betwen "60" and "year" in the second paragraph. "Park" should be capitalized in the same paragraph, as it is part of the name of place. In the third paragraph, there should be a comma in the figure "$3,035." Several extraneous commas, and more, in following paragraphs.

 Nitpicking, to some, but I think it impedes the reader

This has nothing to do with typos, but since we had a Ben & Jerry's tangent a couple weeks ago I decided to pass this along, http://www.wptz.com/news/17539127/detail.html Why didn't they suggest using soy milk instead?  Humans are animals, so why is it ok to milk a human and not a cow?  Anyway, ewwww.

MissIve: Thanks for your input. I understand what you mean, and commas are often where I spend the most time when editing :)

By the way, I looked up (or uplooked?) the word, "overlook" :

Per http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/overlook,
1: to look over : inspect
2 a: to look down upon from above b: to rise above or afford a view of
3 a: to look past : miss b: ignore 1 c: excuse 2
4: superintend , oversee
5: to look on with the evil eye : bewitch

However, upon discussion over lunch with my co-workers, we agreed that overlook is best suited for definition 3 and look over is best suited for definition 1. While I'm sure I will continue to use "overlook" for both, I can't help but keep in mind that I would never use "look over" for definition 3

It's all semitics, after all. (yes, I did that on porpoise) ;)

Jeepers, I'll try and catch up!

Nachista, I kinda like the fingering potatoes, for some reason-maybe it was Robert's naughty post and Bobby boy, you are baaaaaaad! *waggling finger* And it depends on where the beach is, or if there's sun on the beach or if it's a dark night of the sole spectators. There's more, but I'm getting a bit fur afield , said the minx, as she stole away... 

JillyBean-you sink a putt *smirking*

Willie-My bases are untouchable, and all your bases are belong to US! (famous gamer typo)

Missy, I'll give you a a sentence *tapping cigar and waggling eyebrows* 1 to 5 with time off for good behavior!

I'm leaving for In Medias Res at a momentus noticius, so don't impede the reader. I like it!

One candidate would have to be one of the famous Bible typos. The "Wicked Bible" of 1631 contained the words, "Thou shalt commit adultery" in Exodus 20:14, omitting the vital "not."

or

I saw this one in a book my brother got for Christmas once:

It was a newspaper ad for "Sesame Street Live," encouraging people to come see their favorite characters, such as "Big Bird, Bert and Ernie, and the Count."

They only messed it up by one letter- they left out the "o" in "Count."

EEEEEK!

I have to go and sit down. Wait, I AM sitting down...

"It was a newspaper ad for 'Sesame Street Live,' encouraging people to come see their favorite characters, such as 'Big Bird, Bert and Ernie, and the Count.'

They only messed it up by one letter- they left out the 'o' in 'Count."

Oh my!

A friend of mine works for a company that provides IT support to some senate and house offices on capitol hill.  The nature of their jobs keeps them going in and out of their office all day.  One day an employee known for poor spelling sent out a text message to everyone in the company, everyone.  It read

"Where is everyone?  I came in here about 10am and it is now 2, I don't know if I can be in here by myself all day, I might need some help.  I'm kind of tired and want to go home."

Only he left the second "e" off of both heres.

I have long since fallen in love with this group, but today my joy from it is really over the top. What terrific postings and dialogue! If this group were a woman, I would be genuflectedly proposing marriage today.

I let some of my typos go because I feel among friends here. In the real world, however,I have all the monomaniacal zeal of the TEAL dudes. The reason for this is that my last name, in the real world, is misspelled by 60-80% of the time as "Swain." This is a clan curse that has gone on for generations. Everyone in my extended family goes to great pains when ever ordering something where orthography is critical to just come right out and be demonstratively irritable about how it is spelled before any accident occurs. Tombstones have been spelt "Swain." A discrepancy between "Swain" typed on a air ticket and "SWAIM" in the passort has kept me from flying (as in, I queue up and am tossed out of the boarding line). ATM cards and credit cards are commonly sent back by me for this reason. In my view, rendering it as "Swain" is a  20% typographic error rate, which is unacceptable. I got into Phi Beta Kappa as an undergraduate, which means getting a PBK key thingie. I warned the faculty member in charge of PBK that I expected my name to be spelled correctly on the key. She flippantly dismissed my concern and said: "We're dealing with smart people here at the national PBK offices. And I've doing this for 40 years and never once seen them misspell anything." The key came back "Mark Wendell Swain," and I sent it back, got a refund, and decided never to get one.

My TEAL like behavior includes words on signs in hospitals that are unendurably misspelled. Obsessions #1 is the word "guaiac," spelled thus. It seems that no one anywhere knows how to spell it (it gets posted or transcribed as "guiac," "guaic." I have been known to take a magic marker with me onto hospital words and correct it everywhere I see it posted with the misspelling. (I can tell you it has felt like a full-time obsession at times).

One of the reasons for going all emo when my last name is misspelled is that "SWAIM" as a very very interesting history. Insofar as anyone can tell it seems to be the only surname in existence that is an acronym.

Seeking religious freedom, my ancestors, Barentsons from Leerdam, NL, established a Dutch reform protestant colony for themselves on Staten Island. But then events that would lead to 1776 began taking place. The Staten Island Dutch settlers were told that that they'd now have to pay tax to the King of England (ie, the de facto head of the Anglican Church).

Mark-AND...AND?

Did I miss something? Help me out here!

(part deux) (I exceeded space limit with post above).

My ancestors' attitude was bellicose. They'd come seeking freedom, and were now facing something unacceptably onerous. The Barentsons, and a couple of other families decided to organize themselves against the British, to fight if necessary. They called it the Society for War Against Invading Monarchy (SWAIM). They caused mayhem. They did some bloodletting.

And so, gentle folks and friends at PE, coming before any of the troublemakers with names like PLO, IRA, or Al Qaeda, there was the SWAIM. Don't misspell our name or else....or else we'll put sugar in your gas tank.... or something.

Interesting history, Mark! and great trivia as well.

I can relate in that my first name (not Riley, rather Maria), being spelled the English way, is mispronounced by virtually everyone who encounters it. It's a family name, and we decided after that long, not to change either the spelling or pronunciation.

Speaking of T-shirts and such, has anyone seen the British clothing store "FCUK"?

Re: several postings back, the discussion of overlook and oversee.

I was once asked to review an academic manuscript by someone I didn't admire very much. The writing style was dunderheaded, adn it seemed to miserably elaborate itself at the pace of a three-toed sloth. Occasionally, in order to make just enough levity to keep going, I would make completely bogus notes or scholia in the margins. The plan was obviously to go back and erase all these things before returning the manuscript.

The mansucript's title was "An Overview of -----" During the first page, it became clear to me that the MS lacked sufficient detail to satisfy me, and so to entertain myself, I lightly scribbled above "overview" "how 'bout an 'overlooking.'" I forgot to erase this before returning the paper, and believe me, this did NOT advance my career.

At the time of my life, I was very into clipping out really bad typos and collecting them on the refrigerator door. The funniest was a real estate ad that promised buyers that the house had "a big dick for entertaining."

French Connection UK-do ya suppose they did that on purpose, or what?

Riley-Ma RYE ah or Ma REE ah? I'm betting #1...

My second husband wanted a deck on the back of our house, and he told the builder (and later the neighbors, with some pride) that he was determined to have the 'biggest deck in the neighborhood', and if he could've figured out how to do it, I'm sure he would have made it swinging...*rolls eyes*

guaiac guaiac-one of my pet peeves too, Mark.

Mark - must have been one of your kin who was recently a very popular mayor in our fair city here in Oregawn -a very progressive chap - attorney also

Olivia- the first :)

With the deck conversation we, enter the exciting world of puns... one of my favorites

That comma is a typo, by the way

Have a niece named Maria, wish she wasn't so far away...oh don't get us started on puns again! Or DO! It's no PUNishment!

Gosh, I can't seem to stop tonight. There is an old riddle about how to punctuate a bizarre sentence in a way that will make it make sense.  I think it's essentially so difficult as to be insoluble, but the answer has always stuck with me.

The "raw" unpunctuated sentence is the following:

Mary while John had had had had had had had had had had had a better influence on the teacher.

The solution:

Mary, while John had had "had," had had "had had." "Had had" had had a better influence on the teacher.

One of my Aunts taught English and I was always afraid to speak around her.  My pet peeve - seen or saw.  I seen her yesterday.  Almost like fingernails on blackboard.

I missed out on the pun phun.  I'm going to try to catch the cows tail on typos.

If we go to a scenic overlook we look over the edge.  If we come back again to look over and we overlook the warning sign, our friends may have to look over our obit to se if any facts were overlooked.

We have congressional oversight to check for oversights in government programs.

I hope someone/somebody gets to read this.

During my Navy days it would really bother me when someone wanted to "axe" me a question. I would just do my best to overlook (?) it, while grinding my teeth.

that that is is that that is not is not that is it is it not it is

That that is, is. That that is not, is not. That is it, is it not? It is.

Don't tell the saleswoman in the garden department that you are looking for "perch forniture". It sounds kind of nasty and is somewhat embarrassing.

Greetings:  I am not a writer, editor or a good (well) speller.  I don't write on this site to impress folks.  I don't care.  I proof read, but not very well.  Whatever.

Typos I have seen on MLS listings: 

a sinking living room

walking closet

wreck room 

stainless