Making Headlines, Flubbed and Otherwise

I love a recent headline: BRITISH WOMAN SENTENCED TO LIFE IN LAOS.
 
The Columbia Review of Journalism has, or used to have, a last page feature called "The Lower Case." It was all flubbed headlines, and I am sure they are archived on line somewhere.

RED TAPE HOLDS UP NEW BRIDGE
 
CRACK FOUND IN MAN'S BUTTOCKS
 
(from CRJ)

**********Quickly, Most people are just plain silly,*%$#, and %&^$#$###,
                                                      that includes descision makers!
            The television news has a blah- grosteque newslook at all the goings-ons..!
         The 2nd place runner-up, in the Miss America contest , Carrie Prejean was dethroned becasue she believes in traditional marriage. It is a good thing that kids have parents?
And a male rude judge that did not have adequate education and training swore and threw a television fit because he could not toleate  traditional marriage.....weird-side-show..
...huh...the contestant a young adult....going through the hardest years of transitions....20 yrs. of age - 30 yrs. of age trying to keep her crown based on what she said...then plotted against by her peer review and pagaent judges and the fired guy, Donald Trump--      Frumped Carrie from her fame!
My grandmother who was Miss Pottstown, PA enter the very first Miss America contest in Atlantic City....Bert Parks and the Miss America Organization sent us booklets and invitations to attend because she was the third runner-up and entered as a bathing suit contestant! She was a beautiful blue eye big bosum woman...
Let's think,,,,,Increasing vulgariety....on TV.... the fall of Rome, we are getting very lazy minded; and Rome fell within 200 years and America is a little young, too! How odd all these childish oddities have come around on the television tube or digital tv time; (i do not have a converter box and tomorrow marks the big day....and I will be unable to watch free TV...and it could be the best thing going!!! )
Just like the majority of Pittsburghers voted against the building of a sports complex Piratetime stadium, and the football one, and the now hockey one......who will clean the diapers of mess and loss of money... and i went to a game last sunday with free banker tickets ; sat by myself while my friends, pennsylvania citizens lost their basic civil rights and were detained in the guest relations room and not one guest relations person came to help or aid to tell me that my friends were at guest relations....little did they know, that one guest had just help resuce a teenage boy from a gunshot wound to the head, and his father, who served the battle of Normady, passing recently had missed his first pittsburgh pirate game since 1987 because he wanted to have a cigarette even if could go outside....and I had a weird time.......And that's what we love about news of the world and graciousness of our neighbors.....sometimes the life of living in a forest is happier....My grandmother would of loved to of heard Miss California with all her spunk and conviction on her heart-heard view on marriage, family, children.....she dedicated her life to family, she was one of 14 Ukrainian children , teaching piano, singing in church choir, loving and laughing teachng the next generation, and praying with great faith that we have to believe that basic beliefs are good for our safety and survival to gain the greatest compassion...in choosing a lifetime partner. I ask myself, do I want my children to waver and scatter themselves with many partners or follow a fangle fad or do I want them to choose a worthy lifetime partner, I think the answer is obvious; the other is disgustingly gross, yuckand unsafe! It will be great not to watch TV.....
remember this is late nite opinion...I actually can not believe i had to write it....How strange......I must sound.....I need to find a good mystery book!!! Have a nice June day!

haven't bought news papers in decades, all the news is old, although some headlines have historical value worth saving for next generations, perhaps.  news, stock data, weather, movies, and etc.... streams across the internet, across my phone, complete with whole reports.  will though find a used one layed aside, in a cafe or coffee shop and read the funnies, and do the puzzles.  
 
life is good, live it.
 
see ya'll next week! 

cuukoo:  have a great time in Vegas.  Vegas should use TExas' motto-It's a whole other world.
 
I want to hear every detail of the skydiving, having had that same dream for years.

will do!!!! my headline reads; she's so excited.  thanks shandonista, make all your dreams come true!

Traditional newspapers are on the verge of extinction,  much like the dinosaurs of the past, once their environment changed around them.  The Chicago Tribune, the publication that got me addicted to reading about the outside world as a child, is hemorraging red ink at an astronomical scale, and only the Chicago Cubs' national television network and related advertising dollars has spared it to this date.  WGN radio & television stood for "World's Greatest Newspaper" ......  but  without funds to retain key department writers,  all that may remain is the online edition.  The Boston Globe?  Another icon one step from death's door, alive only at the whim of the New York Times Company,  and the pay and pension concessions demanded of the staff may so gut the paper that its die-hard readers abandon ship.  So the headline is more and more a function of attracting the impulse buyer,  like tabloid journalism,  or {gasp!} the rags for sale at the check-out lines in the grocery stores.  We are losing a great tradition, and my media mentor Studs Terkel must be rolling over in his grave.  I loved that man, he walked away from a lucrative career after graduating with honors from the University of Chicago Law School,  and he embraced ordinary people.  Perhaps tonight I will pick up one of his prose masterpieces, and make myself a strong drink.  Without media of all varieties policing the functions of government, this country is in big trouble.  By the time THAT fact appears in headline format, the damage will be irreparable.

One headline I ( and I know others would love to see)

DUMBASS VACCINE DEVELPOED

certainly would solve a lot of the world's ills.

Looking at the subject what first struck me as a no comment turned in to a rant.   

Look at Petermens poll results so far.  Early indicators suggest that headlines sell newspapers. And lets all  give a collective daaaauuuugh!!!!  So not only to they sell papers they tell a story to those who did not by the paper.  Which far outweighs those who did, even back in the hey day of newspapers.  By transitional logic one could argue that  headlines themselves play a large role in formulating public opinion.  I would suggest that the major reason papers are not purchased is because the majority of people just do have the time to inform themselves.  With radio and TV we have become a "sound bite" society only to take over for headlines.  How often in TV news is it you see a 20 second video and a three minute audio.  The video is actually the "headline".  Impressions are made and the book/story is judged by its cover/headline.  How vivid is my memory of the naked little girl in front of the tank. I have no idea what the story was. 

So going political which is very much a news function, hence a Press Secretary, I just have to give praise with extreme caution to the  unheralded capabilities of the press and headline creators.  To appreciate that statistics demonstrate only 30% of the story accurately represents the event, and many times the headline itself, while attention grabbing, do not even capture the essence of the story itself I pause.  I call it the Dan Rather Syndrome.  This alone is an indictment on both our fourth branch of government, and the people who do not make time to pay attention to what the heck is going on.  When you hear Chris Mathews, once an anchor man I respected, say "I view my job to support Obama", NOT QUESTION him like he and the rest of MSNBC did for the last  eight years and still throw stones, we should be alarmed.  To be fare we can all throw dirtballs as Rush for the same. I heard he had a rant comparison of Obama to God yesterday.   

So my aim is not to throw stones but to suggest that We The People, make an attempt to collect news from many different sources and contrast and compare.  In the old days the scorecard was papers or journals sold, TV used a rating system, the Internet tracks who is clicking and reading what.  Heck the in the News yesterday was a story about operation Orange Tree where the government nabbed 50+ sex offenders for child porn.  One might ask why that story wasn't on the front page or above the centerfold?  They say we are a consumer society, let make our dollars count, lets show the Press that we do not have a blind allegiance to any one source of News.  Lets empower our dollars towards a truly free and honest press that serves the people first, make them hear their dollar the hard way by actually doing an honest job of collecting all the facts reporting them rather than selling them.

For those who cry who took this political...Peterman did and thanx.  Politics are always good for conversation, when done right.  The conversation does not necessarily need to be a left/right conversation.  And we could all shy away from it.  But on the heals of what Miss Blue wrote yesterday, I think we are better than that.

How about: TROOPS COME HOME or CHENEY INDICTED

Headline in the NY Post today: WHAT A JOKE! Referring to Yankees now losing 8 straight to Bosox.

Copy that, jmr, about Troops and Cheney!  Or, as I like to call him, Voldemort.
 

Paul Murphy

what did I say and when......I talked all day yeasterday.....stayed up on the soap box wayyy to long I fear. I had a blast though. Got alot off my chest.

Or: BIN A GREAT DAY FOR USBin Ladin Captured  

jmr,
 
When you say troops come home.  DO you mean the ones in Germany, Japan, South Korea, Bosnia, Iraq, Afghanastan?  Or are speaking only to Iraq?  Over recent history every time troops were withdrawn from any battlefield prematurely catsrophe soon followed.
 
Red China, Viet Nam, Iraq, Somalia, Yugoslovia, Cuba,

Mis Blue you spoke of the silent majority in Germany in hte 1930's

SARAH PALIN RENOUNCES POLITICS

Paul, I meant IRAQ.  LIMB CUT OFFShow Cancelled
  

Good lawd....anyone see peter lake?
I checked his page out and he looks like he's dressed for a funeral....hope we didn't scare him too badly yesterday....

jmr,
 
I hate to be so think headed and don't want to be insensitive but your reply was a bit to "headline'ish" are you describing a personal experience, or are you you making a headline like statement?

thick headed

Very true Paul.  Do you get the same sense of foreboding that I do about Afghanistan?  I am very worried it is going to turn into Vietnam all over again.
 
JMR I have friends in Iraq right now, I think a much better headline would be "Peace in Iraq, US Troops return home with honor".  My husband was glad and ready to deploy before he was hurt and placed on TNPQ, ever since Fox Company deployed without him he's been in a state of conflict.  A musician friend of mine said something that kind of sums up how hard core Marines feel about deployments "The only thing worse than touring, for a musician, is NOT touring".  A lot of troops get annoyed when people tell them they want them to STOP doing their jobs, abandon their mission and come home to sit on their thumbs.  I just want them to be safe, do the right thing, and be proud of their service.

OBAMA ADMITS MAN BOOBS   when was the last time you sw the man with his shirt off?

Nachista,   Your statement is very compelling.  I love the association.  First let me tell you when I was young I was a Viet Nam protester, but was totally ingorant of the facts.  Today I have regrets beginning and foremost with the disrespect we give our troops in the course of our political voice.  I clearly rememember when reading on Le Duc Tao comment to Kissinger, " we don't have to win this war, you are going to lose, read your papers".  It was with those words I personnaly too responsibility for one too many casulties of American troops.  It saddeds me to this day.  Hence I always check myself and my agenda at the door when I venture out and ask "is what I am about to say going to have a positive affect on the situation?"   To compare Viet Nam to Afghanastin or any other of the countries in that theater, you must compare the agenda.  If you subscribe that standing up a democracy makes the world safer and there are no other alternative that equal that, then the cause may be worth a good look.  In Viet Nam, there was never a regiem that could be stood up for a democracy to thrive.  The question in Iraq: is there fertile ground for democracy?  Sure there are factions, but there are millions of people with purple fingers and hundreds of new schools.  I have heard from many a Captain on their tour that once they figured out that they need to teach the local "how to elect a mayor"  we started seeing significant improvement.  In other words success was being achieved, not reported.  If indeed that is the case, the last thing I wish for is an early return on a mission not accomplished as I do not want to add Iraq to the last of failures due to the American vacuum.

I like your headline, nachista.  I certainly understand that Marines and probably other branches of the service would feel that way.  Heck, they're trained to do a certain job - one that many civilian folks hope they'll never actually have to do.
 
I come at this topic with little experience, not being very close to anyone who actually serves right now.  Perhaps it is part of my naivete, but I think that no matter the outcome, the troops will return with honor; it is the politicians who dishonor the process of ending a war.

I poseted the draft  red this one
 

Nachista,

Your statement is very compelling.  I love the association.  First let me tell you when I was young I was a Viet Nam War protester, but was totally ignorant of the facts.  Today I have regrets beginning and foremost with the disrespect we give our troops in the course of our political voice.  I clearly remember when reading on Le Duc Tao commented in response  to Kissinger who laid a legitimate peace settlement on the table, " we don't have to win this war, you are going to lose, read your papers".  it was with reading those words I personally took responsibility for one too many casualties of American troops.  It saddens me, knowing that the Viet Nam travesty began with Woodrow Wilson's prejudice towards the yellow man and my ignorance to it then, to this day.  Let the troops come home, and make sure they come home with honor.   Hence I always check myself and my agenda at the door when I venture out and ask "is what I am about to say going to have a positive affect on the situation?"

To compare Viet Nam to Afghanistan or any other of the countries in that theater, you must compare the American agenda first.  If you subscribe that standing up a democracy makes the world/us safer and there are no other alternatives equal to it, then the cause may be worth a good look.  If not we can debate it but not at the expense of our troops.  In Viet Nam they wanted "self determination and Ho Chi Min asked Wilson for it in 1919.  With its denial he got what he needed from the USSR and took it to a very determined people.  After the demarcation decision of 1954 there was never a regime in the South that could be stood up on its own let alone against Ho Chi Min, for a democracy to thrive.  The question in Iraq: Is there fertile ground for democracy?  Sure there are factions, but there are millions of people with purple fingers and hundreds of new schools and hospitals that give us hope.  Lets not forget ho long it too our Great country to get things in order.  I have heard from many a Captain on return from their tour that once they figured out that they need to teach the locals "how to elect a mayor"  we started seeing significant improvement.  In other words success was being achieved, but not reported.  If indeed that is the case, the last thing I wish for is an early return on a mission not accomplished as I do not want to add Iraq to the last of failures due to the American vacuum.

Second you must compare the agenda of the countries in question.  I think Afghanistan like Pakistan, like Iraq  want to be free from tyranny, whether Hussein or the Taliban. In Afghanistan, those people, like Viet Nam, Iraq, have never experienced democracy at a local level and its role at a national level, but unlike Viet Nam, there appears to be a leadership  at the State level willing to make it work and a clear desire to have the security from tyrants.  Once they learn it from top down, I would think they will be, like Japan and Germany, contributing countries towards world peace beyond their boarders.  So to answer your question simply Afghanistan and Viet Nam do not belong in the same conversation.  I do have grave concerns about Pakistan.

Another rant but in the first paragraph clearly on topic.  Second two hopefully answers your question.

Paul murphy......
 
 
I give you a standing ovation.
 
 
we are the same people!
I was a peacenick in the 70's and now look at me.
 
You are far more eloquent than I.
Please write a piece on how we should not be embracing the Chinese with such open arms.
We sould be doing more with the largest democracy on the planet....India!
Nixon almost queered that deal for good because he didn't like Mrs Gandhi.
Where did she turn...the Soviet Union.
and you are very correct.....a lot of the world is ruled by tribal thugs... most of the people don't even have a concept of what democracy is, and if we are not careful, we will loose that understanding as well.

 
 
 
and I stick by my initial post and will volunteer for the clinical trials(hahaha)

Here's my headline. A little megalomania with historical resonances:

ISLES APPOINTED WELTKANZELER BY UNITED NATIONS-IN-EXILE.

Heh heh heh...

who's in exile you or the un

I'm shrieking out of the ivory tower into the howling void of an echo chamber.

Miss Blue

thanx...I know what I said is stepping out on the limb carrying a saw of humility  of "It is what it is", so call reality.  Having been in that part of the world spanning from the Middle East to Maylasia, I agree that the most productive and determined work force on earth is in India.  It is who we should be partnering with.  On China.  I'll start with reference to my review I wrote on a recent book not too long ago.

I once sat in an Indian restaurant in Guangzhou, China discussing politics with our Chinese host, and guests including an Australian, Indian, and me the American.  We discussed two things that night.   First was how in some countries communism is a precursor to free enterprise as some countries need autocratic rule to organize its people.  We then transition to debate as to whether China should join the NBA or form a league of its own.  We toasted to our friendship in with my guard down I drank a drink with ice.  Dysentery set in the next day of my long ride across the ocean on China Southern Airlines.  Yes the seats are smaller...a lot smaller when you have dysentery.  10 days and 40 lbs later gave me a lot of time to reflect on what's working and what is not working in China.   Their problems are daunting...beginning with a free press (staying on topic)

http://cigarroomofbooks.blogspot.com/2007/12/new-chinese-empire.html

 goyya go to Pungo for horse stuff.......running late.
 
 
 
i fear what is happening with our debt situation etc here....will talk more later.

What do you teach, Michael?   I recall it's at the university level, but I don't recall a subject or course. And by the way, I'm in total agreement about "Twittered news."  Little spits of usually useless information that's updated every few seconds/minutes/whatever.  I guess the point is that it's so very up to the minute, right?  But if it's useless, who cares? I don't want to get my information in tweets.  Tweets!  Are we grown-ups yet?

Michael and Park4, right on about the continuously updated news.  It's just like people who are on their cell phones all day long.  You see them in the supermarket and their conversation goes like this:  "oh, not much, buying some chicken nuggets.  What are you doing?  Yeah, like, let's do something later.  I dunno, what do you wanna do?"
 
Mindless time wasting is all it is.  Something to divert us from thinking about anything important or real or serious or depressing or sad or terrific or, or , or.....
 
Just like multi-tasking has been shown to be a myth, or at the very least, counter-productive, the constant barrage of so-called information (whether by cell phone or cable news or the internet) is, I think, detrimental to our thought processes and, dare I say, contributes to a growing dissatisfaction with life in general because it is creating an expectation of constant entertainment.  Our brains have not necessarily evolved to keep pace with the technology.  At least, mine hasn't.  I can't tell you how many damned passwords I have to remember....drives me crazy!
 
 

I teach English 101 and 102, which are supposed to be composition, research, critical thinking, and intertextuality (using stuff from one area and using it in other areas, a concept that many students have trouble with).
 
Telling students that the way to get information is to question everything, no matter the source, doesn't seem to sink in very easily.

Very compelling stuff Paul.  I'm not comparing the political climate of Afghanistan to Vietnam, merely contemplating possible outcomes.  Look at the history of Afghanistan, in the last couple hundred years no country has ever won a war against that country on its own soil (true we help them with the Russians, but still it was them that won).  It has to be the Afghan people who rise up, ask for help and then with the aide of powerful countries conquer its own demons and open itself up for progress, growth, and prosperity.  Its possible, but it won't be easy and there is always the possibility that it could all end very badly... but let's hope for the best.

Oh, and I dip my toe into literature on occasion, but I try not to take it too seriously.

Nachista,
 
I think that is the difference.  The Afghan people are looking to create their own sovriengty free from the Russians, The Taliban and the Americans.  I view our mission there the sames as in Iraq as it stands today, to help them in their cause.  Here is a interesting puzzling question, is the Taliban their demon or are they the worlds demon?  When does the one man with one cause in peace notion cross boarders.  In Darfor we looked the other way.  In Afghanistan we didn't.  Is the answer in what I just said...or is there a better one?  In my mind, talking about these things does not have to be political at all.  In fact it shouldn't.  The questions are challenging and in America no party has demonstrated supreme knowledge on the subject.
 
Michael,  on the techno thing, I laugh at the people who are on their cell phone telling their host that they are coming down the street and will be knocking at the door in any second.  ANd on that topic I would be the first person to advocate more liberal arts into techno degrees.  We need a strong base in history and philsophy to start with.  Twitter is a good argument towards my case. 
 
I am often found relishing the time of the 1900's when advancements were beginning to improve our living condition, but distract us from our moral footing.  Its not uncommon for you to hear me say I wish we could all have a second crack at the 20th century. 

but  NOT distract us from our moral footing, \
 
of course historical events says that either we wer edistracted, or we never had any.

Paul: Technology can be a wonderful thing, but I am saddened by how it is misused.  With instant communication, we lose the careful thought that is sometimes (but not always) behind slower media.

How about STONEY RETURNS TO EYE, rock solid as always? I have missed hearing from our sage pal for the last several days... Am assuming Neptune is in the throes of The Season. Maybe they do as I do, and sneak in to read without time to respond... happy weekend, all,                       
wt.

Whew...I not use to giving an opinion too often.....I worked outside all day 62 degrees  nice and cool, cutting bushes, trimming hemlocks, and cutting the grass with a lawn mower mulcher-type.....yea....someone planted ivy and it spreads all over the property and up the hemlocks...out of control......sometimes I get alot spirited...like the Ivy and I really should not wrtie in these communicative notes..and I am going to quit the Peterman's eye conversation salon......but a last note.... the honeybees were not out....not one bumble bee..... or anything......I haven't seen grasshopers like I use too....lightning bugs are out last nite for the first time....but really, the Honey Bee is dying out ; we delivered 9 panels of honeybees with a queen to start new colonies and after beekeepers tried to open up the panel and check the eggs.....there were none...there were no HoneyBees in my vegetable or herb garden......  : (   no, I am afraid I moving from Pittsburgh real soon.....and back to the forest....in the country....I have a music festival in September called Joe Pye ;after Joe Pye weed which grows 9 feet tall...trumpet plant pretty purple colors i will submit one last picture to this conversational salon...Joe Pye....and say good bye, but I must read up on other things.....I did like all the writers informative tidbits...and such...At University of Hawaii, my daughter told me 2 weeks ago that there are over 44 cases of Swine Fleu and Kansas is Tornadic......I need to travel after my sons fly fishing camp and visit Kentucky and check the historical society records of my family's polo farm look for gravestone markers, write more books, and check on the children in Hawaii and Kansas .....so new direction...for me enjoy the picture....joe pye weed.

Don't be afraid, Gustina, there are places where the bee is alive and well. Around my house, for instance. I sit quietly outside and hear them working. A beautiful sound.

To Jonathan, Bumble Bees... Bullfrogs...Dragon Flies near the Blue Spruce Creek, sing and buzz to the moving waterfalls beneath their feet! A beautiful sound....Help Save the Honey Bee!  FINI

WARNING: RANT: I don't fear the future, I don't fear the technology. I've accepted America is going to be a cross of Idiocracy and Wall-E. Everyone fat, stupid, lazy and permanently wired into the world wide webaverse. I've become convinced that the rest of the world is going to treat us like the leper-country we are and make us more isolated than North Korea. America's a nice place to visit but you wouldn't want to live there. Obama's not the savior but neither was McCain or any other political buffoon that has the audacity to pander to the public in soundbites and ideas but not hardcore facts. A truly qualified person would never be President because the hours are horrible, and the pay is low. The smart guy didn't win the past election but the smarter guy did. 2012 is not going to be end of the world. There is no conspiracy to annex Mexico or take away the guns or any other ideas rthe right and the left can come up with in order to scare the general public. Three Jews don't control the world banks, China is not out to "get us," and people who keep bitching that their side lost any election (the Anti-Stadium people, the Gore Voters, the Kerry Voters, the McCain Voters) need to get over it. Life's unfair so get used to it. Foreigners don't get to own businesses in this country tax-free either. They're successful because they busted their asses and didn't spend all their money on cable, McDonald's, & beer. They lived below their means which is a lesson the majority of the American Trash out there needs to understand. America's sense of entitlement is baffling. Even with the economy supposedly in the toilet, I still see people spending like there's no tomorrow, only buying less expensive things, but still buying stuff they don't need and have convinced themselves they want. Luxury is not about having it all, it's about being taken care of. I hope and pray that the missles will come, and the power will go out, and then some real change just may happen. We had a chance to take another crack at the 20th Century with 9/11/2001, but blew it on YouTube and wine coolers. Good luck, we're all going to need it.                                                     

I cast my lot with Nachista on the Afghanistan issue. Both the Vietnam and Afghanistan theaters have been mostly about keeping alive the US military industrial complex, not about really winning. Their goal is to marinade sans strategy. We're fighting a medieval group of uncoordinated garrisons in Afghanistan.
 
I also agree with Zev above. Class mobility has quietly disappeared in the U.S. Obama's presidency is creating increasing un-ease in me. Government meddling  is now knee-deep and rising. What is it with Obama and his near-daily speeches? Trying to imitate Enver Hoxha is he?

One reasons I really chime in with Zev above is from seeing the American thing through medical eyes. Overnutrition, underactivity, and self-abuse are 99% of what US doctors treat.

I really liked Sara Palin renounces politics -- we shouldadd, though, that she gave it up to sell Avon.  As well, along with Cheney indictment how about Dubya  :)

I'll be in the Bay tomorrow, taking a gander at what I hope will be my Express Ticket outta Dodge should the moment arrive faster than I'm anticipating - or in a year thereabouts - whichever comes first. Any Eyelanders wanna grab a beer?

Overnutrition, underactivity, and self-abuse are 99% of what US doctors treat.
 
And yet, almost none of them ever ask their patients about it.  The patient is responsible for their own behavior but if the doc doesn't ask, how the hell is treatment and cure supposed to happen??

How do I know this?  I've gained about 20 pounds in the past 5 years.  I'm 44.  No one but me seems to think this is a problem.
 
 

Peter Lake - I think your picture makes you look like an international man of mystery...